We Are All Through, Baby (Summertime Kiss Memories)

Kiss is not typical summer music. You'd expect a sun and fun catalog from a band whose signature mantra has come to be "rock and roll all night and party every day," but the Beach Boys they're not. One doesn't lunge from a diving board to the accompaniment of "King of the Nighttime World." "Dance All Over Your Face" sounds silly coming from a boombox (note: I type this from experience). Though it may be a great line to shout at grilling hot dogs, "Burn Bitch Burn" bombs at the beach (see above).

Kiss in the summer is like picturing current-weight Gene in Paul's Dynasty outfit - it really doesn't work.. The hotter than hell season is about the great expansive outdoors; Kiss is about controlled environment. It's like comparing a mountain hike to Disneyworld. In the former, you escaping from the world; the latter, you enter one. That's okay; we'll leave tailgating and summer loving tunes to the Van Halens, AC/DCs and Aerosmiths of the world. For the most part, Kiss songs are part and parcel of an enveloping multi-sensory experience, a complete production where people don't have to fill in the blanks... on blankets or otherwise. A bomb goes off here. Someone flies there. As for the songs that weren't designed for or don't quite fit the live Kiss format, I'll rationalize thusly: Sometimes the group were firing blanks, being "artists" or just a regular, mortal band.

Kiss has done well throughout U.S. summers past, but it's been through touring and releasing albums, not by getting on the radio and becoming audio memory engrams for the mass public. You'll never hear a recollection like:

"I remember meeting Shandi, and riding on the roller coaster as "Danger" was playing. We later kissed on the pier while "Love Gun" was on my portable AM radio...." Chalk it all up to being equal parts airplay and conceptual issues.

There has been one major exception to the rule, of course. One Kiss song that played on beaches and boardwalks everywhere, and followed everyone into the clubs at night. Of course, I'm talking about the single version of "Rocket Ride." Only kidding - It didn't even chart in the summer.

"I Was Made for Loving You" fit the bill as being one of those typical summer songs, as in June and July of '79 it came out of all kinds of speakers in all sorts of places. Unfortunately, this omnipresence was achieved through altering the Kiss formula to incorporate sounds from the most despised of music by gas-crunch era rock fans: disco. The song's backlash potential was fully realized through (among other things) the supreme bombing of "Sure Know Something" as a single (it would have done at least a little better, don't you think?). By 1981, it seems as though the band and management learned what I'm typing here, for through fiscal year 1989 Kiss was essentially an autumn entity, releasing new recorded product (and sometimes almost as frequently changing guitarists) every time the leaves fell.

(Music From) The Elder began the trend of post-summer album releases where related singles, tours and everything else were put away like long pants by spring. There's more to this, but first, let's take a left turn....

Thought Vault Left Turn

Come to think of it, there were some new Kiss products that came out during the warm weather of the 1980s. Review your 1985 Kiss calendars. That year's spring saw not one, but two (actually three, if you count the awesome Funky Enterprises late Animalize era blue background poster) releases appear for sale at the same time as charcoal. The Creatures of The Twilight, er, Night (sorry - it's that cover. Didn't they realize after the door knocker disc that brown is bad?) reissue was a late-spring happening (besides one fanzine statement attributing Paul as the source, was there anything else in print at the time - like an interview - related to this release? It was kind of just put out there....) and the Animalize Live and Uncensored videotape.

While the Musicvision concert was awesome (and remains one of my favorite Kiss things, period), like the revamped Creatures it wasn't totally new as it was tied to an original fall/winter release (just to be official, the former debuted in shortened form on MTV in either November or December of '84, and the first edition of the latter first hit in October of 1982 ).

Then there was the advent of compact disc. Here in the States (Germany had us beat by a mile with selected albums), the Kiss catalog began to be issued (and nicely flawed, at that) in spring of 1987 ("Kiss on CD!"). That was a pretty big deal - I still remember how I marveled upon hearing the first digital Destroyer for the first time. The aforementioned were all released without major involvement on the band's part, and they were routinely sequestered recording while we were swimming. In fact, when the bonafide, brandy-new Kiss Exposed was released in late May of 1987, it messed with my internal clock. A Kiss release in warm weather? With advance press?

I liked Kiss' strict summer hibernation/fall assault schedule of the 1980s. Like any other kid, the end of summer was a sad time for me. But thanks to my heroes, I always had a new Kiss album to look forward to, a soundtrack for the coming school year. To this day, I still pull out Animalize every September - and I still think of that damn Mrs. Granito and her algebra tests.

S-P-E-C-I-A-L: Bally Pin Poster Owner Surfaces!

Luckily, not many saw these sub-par renderings of the '77 tourbook/solo album head shots on the wooden sides of the unit, for they were blocked by other games. Granted, airbrushing technology was simple back then, but why didn't Bally splurge for some sort of adhesive art?

From Jason: Believe it or not, that Bally pinball poster does exist. A regular version and a blacklight version. I own the regular version, and it cost me a pretty penny.

Okay, and you keep it right next to your copy of Peter Criss' Face Without A Kiss, right? Any chance of you sending me a J-peg's worth of proof? Does it have the typical-for-its-time Aucoin/Niocua fine print?

Hmm, not only do you assert that you have the regular pinball machine poster, but you claim a "Dark Light" version was made available? That's weird. The pinball backglass was yellow and orange, with black here and there (costumes, etc.). These late-'70s ganja room posters were dark; black, red and purple were often primary colors. So, if the Bally machine art was repro'd in the purple light bulb format, it would presumably look really strange. But wasn't that the idea with those things?

Feel free to get back in touch with a pic, Jason - you are the only soul on the planet to come forward and claim ownership of the Atlantis (well, at least here) of Kiss artifacts. Now you have me thinking about how Bally's Kiss pinball machine is part of some of my fondest childhood summer memories.

"We-ah Gonna Do Some Old Stuff..."

I spent my early '80s summers in Seaside Heights, which is along the Jersey Shore. I was a boardwalk rat; my family was friends with some people who own an arcade and some other various amusements, some of which I was even working by the time I logged a dozen years on this planet (my time on Jendell didn't carry over). Sometimes when I was bored (get...), I would walk (it?) the length of the boardwalk, and check every single arcade for a Kiss pinball machine.

"See this pinball in my hand? I'm going to crush it... and Kiss too!"

As you American readers know, during 1980-83, Kiss couldn't be any more dead here. But what you may not immediately recall is that the salad days for the pastime of pinball concurrently were coming to an abrupt halt. Video games had taken over as the latest "insert coin here" form of family entertainment, and silver ball units were pushed into the back corners of every amusement center to make room for the new school. A Kiss-branded pin, therefore, had two strikes against it: It was Pac-Man, not Catman, who ruled the arcades, and for a bit even the music charts - Buckner and Garcia's "Pac-Man Fever" single went gold, while Kiss's releases were seemingly getting eaten by ghosts.

2X Bonus

In summer '82 I managed to find not one, but two Kiss machines in separate places. They were in markedly different states of condition. The much-trafficked Lucky Leo's one had a bulb burnt out in the backglass logo, and cigarette burns on the playing field glass. But among the skee-ball and prize crane machines in the back of Big Top Arcade was a nearly-mint unit.

All day long it sat there, with the display mode proudly flashing out the Kiss logo (which looks a lot like the current Kiss stage logo) hundreds of times a day, to no one in particular. The backglass artwork featured a hyper-rendered Kiss on stage, in the costumes of their biggest hey day (1977-'78), surrounded by smoke and fire. Think the Mego figures, if animated.

Even then, I knew it was the ultimate anachronism, even among other uncool games like The Harlem Globetrotters and Eight-Ball Deluxe. Kiss was a throwback to another time, when the band ruled and pinball was the only game in town. Now, it was being ignored, for the Pac-Man family of games, Galaxian and even that sissy Journey video game (which Bally had a hand in producing, mind you).

The appearance of some garden variety targets was surprising, but typical for the time. I wish I could say the same about that black cauldron... Check out the letters on the right side. What with spelling out "Kiss" and nailing "A-B-C-D" being prime objectives, wasn't this game just a little too letter happy? More on art: The table design also featured a couple of Love Gun girls, who let's face it, were probably having a hard time getting work by the time this thing was put together. They were certainly well rendered, though.

I didn't ignore it; I played the heck out of it, my games not merely entertaining bouts equal parts skill and chance, but check-ins with my heroes. I was attracted to the machine like the guy in that old Twilight Zone episode who kept going back to Zorba (right name?). It felt like I was visiting a great power that was lying dormant, and only I knew it was there... kinda nuts, right?

3X Bonus

For those of you who have never seen it in person, or want to remember, Kiss was a decent pinball game. Besides being equipped with a music playing computer chip, it wasn't groundbreaking, but it was comfortable to play, and if the table was balanced properly, a fair challenge - especially if a credit equaled five balls.

Remember the Susan B. Anthony dollar coin? First made in 1979 and retired by '81, it failed to replace the paper buck. Perhaps if more people played pinball it would have stayed around longer; Many games had slots for ol' Susie (it's in the middle here), who was a proponent of women's rights. Paying to play with one awarded a customer with five credits, a 25-cent bonus value.

Dropping in a coin produced a little lead-in sound to "Rock and Roll All Nite," which was strange in that the programmers stretched out the "I" part of the chorus into three separate notes in an effort to approximate the way Kiss sings it. Oh well, it was 1978, and they tried. Other sound effects were effective, but shared by other Bally efforts.

For those of you who don't like that part of "RARAN," a little rewriting could be done, via the spring launcher. If you pulled it back far enough and let go of it in a hurry, you would replace "...and party every" with a bumper noise (I would add my own music by tapping out "Love Gun" with the flippers after every shot). The table was simply designed, but very Kiss.

Unlike the backglass, where Paul is front and center, everyone was represented equally. In fact, there is a little built-in test in perspective; Gene and Paul's faces are on the top borders of the table, which one might say is accurate to their rank in the band. Peter (whose hair is a little too Keith Partridge, as if depicting the Cat as a teen kitty) and Ace's faces are below, on the board itself, smack dab in the middle of bumperville. So, which duo had better placement? It depends on your perspective. I personally always noticed Gene and Paul first (check out the table picture in this Vault to test yourself).

Aside from the above quasi-disparity, it's even Steven, except for two little gates that when spun by a passing ball rotate Gene's head 360 degrees in forward motion. Speaking of representation, Kiss... the name (here's another loose Mego connection - remember the action figures jingle?) figures heavily into the game, as multiplying point values hinged on spelling it, up to 16 times. What "looks insane" (that song is now stuck in my head) is that while it would follow logic (and the Kiss timeline) to have the four logos rendered in the band's solo hues, yellow (Vinnie's color?) and white were used instead of Paul and Ace's shades for discontinuity-tainted scoring fun.

Another musical moment occurred after your final turn ended, which would cue the most mechanical, yet saddest of chorus of "Shout it Out Loud" imaginable.

4X Bonus

Overall, Bally's Kiss pinball machine was one among many of the company's late '70s entries into the arcades, but perhaps barring the excellent Playboy, it carried the highest profile of them all.

The group talked it up here and there; I distinctly recall Gene bragging about the musical sounds in a solo album era magazine feature. It hit TV prime time when briefly seen during the band's segment on the show 20/20 in 1979. In between lame attempts to knock the band for being successful, was a clip of Gene and Ace in full Dynasty regalia hamming it up around a machine. While the guitarist plays (and poorly), Simmons makes a weak attempt to get "in character" by clawing at the ball. It rolled away unharmed, with the table glass protecting it from such a vicious attack. Full-page ads appeared in comic books and music rags (not to mention the Dynasty tourbook and album order form, where the mythical pinball poster was offered). Both are now common advertising outlets for game companies.

Today, of course, Kiss is quite the collectible, appealing to both fans of those band and those who flip for the silver ball. As of 1987, Paul Stanley supposedly had one still in its shipping box (this was reported in Kerrang! that year).

If you want one, shop carefully, and find or become a good repairman, for late '70s Bally machines are prone to breakdown (the guy that let me use these images said they "can be a real bear to maintain and repair - caveat emptor").

I don't even know if anyone is still reading this, but where exactly has this machine been? As far as I know, America was covered border to border as far as distribution. How about the rest of the world? Does anyone have any knowledge of this thing sitting next a Pachinko machine in Japan, or next to an espresso maker in an Italian cafe? It did turn up in the Bon Jovi video "Only Lonely" in 1985, which was lensed in Jersey....

Also, I do not know of any Kiss pins that are currently in the wild (an arcade, bar, etc.). If anyone does, please let me know.

Here's an oddly placed discussion prompt: During the '70s, terrible (literally) Ted Nugent had his own flipper fest, made by Stern Electronics (discuss this among yourselves).

Colossal Bonus

Casual Kiss fans close your eyes, because it's time to go completely off the rails. What if, in their infinite marketing wisdom, Kiss had inked a deal with Bally to produce not one, but a series of pinball machines? The 1978 model could have been followed by a Dynasty-themed game, etc. Let's get completely ridiculous and imagine if each of our heroes had his own machine; Ace's Space Race ("where you have to score your points on time"), Peter's Jungle Challenge ("don't lose your temper and the ball")....

There was an unofficial sequel to the Kiss pin. It was a custom job, based on the maroon-infested Smashes, Thrashes and Hits art. Along with an angry Peter Criss, it appeared at a couple of New Jersey conventions in the early '90s.

Just one more thing: I can kick anyone's codpiece at Kiss pinball. Game over.

Thought Vault Intermission: "Shockin' Time?" Put on your handy 45 of "Kissin' Time" (if someone's borrowing it, your CD of the first album will just have to do) and listen to Petey's playing during the verses. Then, go and check out any live performance of "Shock Me" since 1998 or so. During Ace's final request for electrocution (the first chorus after the solo), our favorite feline plays closely to the way he accented the guitar in the verses to "Kissin' Time!" Okay, it's not like Peter has heard "Kissin'..." since the last time he played it 25 years ago, but....

Now, from the Thought Vault personality file....

First Kiss, Last Tour: How Many of You Have Had the Pleasure of Taking a Child to see Kiss?

Teacher and student. Notice the complete set of McFarlane figures and the statue of Mary behind us - our backs were covered.

Pre-show: enjoying some music. Ron (thinking to himself): She must be enjoying this song. Gina: Why are hunters lonely?

Meet Gina Mattaliano. She's nine years old, and recently completed fourth grade under my tutelage at Our Lady of Mt. Carmel School in Jersey City, New Jersey (home of Roosevelt Stadium). Some of her interests are cats, talking and music. Thanks to me, she recently saw her first Kiss concert.

When our heroes stoically announced their good-bye jaunt on VH1 (what was wrong with them during this thing?), I just knew I had to find a kid to take with me to one of the Meadowlands shows. Seeing Kiss live had lost a little of its zing for me as of late, and by seeing them vicariously through a child's eyes, I hoped to simply take the show at face value, instead of carping about the set list, or straining my eyes to see the piano wires that carry Gene.

I also wanted to help pass along the Kiss torch to a younger generation by giving someone a chance to see them before they cease being a live entity.

After searching through my family tree for a suitable candidate to no avail, I turned to my students. "I want to take about three of them," I had told my wife Antoinette at first.

"You're nuts. You can't do that in this day and age."

"But it's Kiss," I responded as though citing some implacable law of nature long supported by Supreme Court decisions. Still, after giving it some thought I decided to take just one student.

"Now, these are the actual templates that Luther wanted."

Mrs. Mattaliano was one of my class mothers. Thanks to her daughter's in-depth accounts of her school days, she was aware of my loving Kiss (it came up in class a couple of hundred times)*. One day, I asked if she would allow me to take her daughter to the concert. She loved the idea, and I decided to ask Gina the next day during snack time. After the bell rang at the end of recess, I shooed the rest of the kids away from my desk, and called her over. After I popped the question, her eyes lit up and she immediately answered in the positive. Holding back a smile, I told her to go get ready for social studies. By the time I turned to erase the board, she had returned (she never liked to stay in her seat).

"Mr. A, I would definitely like to go."

Gina Mattaliano

This is not Gina Mattaliano

When I picked her up for the concert, my jaw dropped when she came out of the house with a star painted over her right eye.

"Mr. A, do you think I look funny with this on?"

"No Gina," I said, "you'll see a lot of people dressed up." I thought she looked great (and had certainly picked the right member). Sure enough, there would be no less than three kids her age in our row with painted faces.

We had skipped Skid Row, and just had to sit through Turd Nugent. I diverted Gina's attention from his vulgarity with Cracker Jacks.

As for the Kiss show, from "Detroit Rock City" forward Gina was mesmerized, and never really took her eyes off the Starchild. In fact, no sooner than the solo in "Deuce" she exclaimed, "he dances funny!"

I had brought my binoculars for her, and they were seemingly connected to her eyes for almost two hours. From time to time she would lower them, as if to confirm what she was seeing through the lenses was real.

She sang along to "Shout it Out Loud," "Heaven's on Fire" and "Lick it Up."

Anytime Paul spoke, she laughed. At one point, she asked me one of the great unanswered Kiss Kwestions: "Why does he talk like that?"

After we caught confetti during "Rock and Roll All Nite," it was clear she thought the show ruled. I did too. It was a great concert (the Revenge-style attendance was alarming, though) and a thrill to see the reactions of someone who hadn't seen Kiss a million times. I'm happy to say that in this case, the band's presentation proved to be timeless, and thoroughly enjoyable.

Gina and her parents were appreciative of my taking her along, but I'm the one who should do the thanking. I had a great time, "Gina Mott!"

*We had watched Kiss Meets the Phantom in my class earlier in the year, and the kids loved it. As you could imagine, Gene was by far the favorite of the boys, while Paul won the hearts of the girls (his "turn and shake" move in the opening credits produced many giggles). Ace also generated a few votes for being the cool guy among each gender.

Though my students were able to spot the plot fairly easily, afterward I had to tie up a few loose ends ("what happened to those motorcycle people?") and clarify the back story on the tailsmen. Also...
1) They all sang along with "Rock and Roll All Nite" during the opening sequence.

2) The evil Gene's rampage scene scored some oohs and ahs.

3) The girls seemed to sympathize with the plight of Melissa, whose boyfriend Sam was turned into a robot - with bad balance.

4) They all wanted to know the why and how of Deveraux's change in hair color (was it during the commercial?)

That's all for now! Next time, the Kiss Thought Vault will be heavily based on Ron Responds, where among other things Unmasked, British professors and the "slavegirl" will be addressed. Expect it in November 2000.